By Erica Cerles, Aikido 1st-dan

I initially walked into Aikido by the Bay in 2019 for two attractive reasons: 1) Perhaps I, Erica Cerles, didn’t have to move through the world feeling like an easy target for others, and 2) The Walking Dead is a fictional story, for now, so I should learn how to confidently kick some zombie ass just in case. After doing a bit of research, I learned that principles of aikido aligned well with my spiritual practice and Aikido by the Bay was just down the street, so I signed up for a free intro class. What’s more novel than trying out a martial art? I literally didn’t know one person who had stepped foot in a dojo before. After all, I’ve learned to be an open-minded person who seeks to experience a full life on this planet. And that trait has allowed me to crawl through the confines of safety and monotony before, which is something I desperately needed at the time in my life when I walked through the doors.

Four years later, and I’m testing for shodan level. It’s taken persistence, discipline, and a blind, shaky belief that I could one day be effective at this. But it’s also been a fairly smooth journey for me for a very specific reason. The people I’ve met through aikido haven’t stopped believing in me, all while treating me with patience, respect, and ultimately kindness. I’ve found a community in aikido that provides a steady home whenever I need it. In my opinion, our dojo actually represents what the world could be; communities of people working to push justice forward with patience, strength, and love. Training has meant showing up with these people in small, focused ways, over and over again. I’m here today not because of the big, sweeping moments in my aikido training, but rather because of the consistent daily efforts I’ve put into my practice with a supportive community of friends around me. 

So what are my goals in pursuing aikido as I prepare for my shodan test? I hope to make aikido a lifelong practice. I hope to continue building meaningful, collaborative connections with others, inside and outside of the dojo.  I hope to learn, with humility, how to approach life’s challenges in a non-clashing manner, with peace as the ultimate goal. Training in aikido is a mental challenge unlike any other I’ve experienced before. I have days where I’m in tears with self-doubt, and others where I feel overwhelmed with impatience and judgment. As I train, I am learning to pause in my awareness and proceed with peaceful, direct intention. Ultimately, the more I train in aikido, the more I understand my own power and how to use it. And I plan to use that power to help lift up others who struggle, knowing that I am firmly rooted in myself and trusting in the mysteries of life. I still don’t feel confident that I’d survive the zombie apocalypse, but I do feel immense gratitude for how far I’ve come, both mentally and physically, with the support of the Aikido by the Bay community.